A few of my recent blogs have mentioned that we’ve been facing loads of change. Not only that, the changes have felt so overwhelming at times that it’s been like falling down a rabbit hole that was surrounded by quicksand. You can read the two most relevant blogs Rabbit holes and quicksand and 10 ways to deal with rabbit holes and quicksand here.
Each time we thought we had found solid ground something would happen, and we’d be back at stage one again. This was particularly obvious last week when, again, the best plan of action seems to change hourly.
This was causing me huge amounts of anxiety.
On the surface it may seem as though we have only one priority: MOVE FROM HERE.
Which is true. It is our OVERRIDING priority. Yet how to achieve that is more complex.
We actually have several options about how to achieve the goal. Over the last week I’ve come to realise that it is these options that have been causing the problem.
You see NONE of them felt 100% right. There were always pros and cons to each option. I spent hours, and I do mean HOURS, going over the different options in my head.
What was the right thing for us to do?
I would spend even more time discussing the options with Andrew.
Yet we never came up with one clear winner.
The result has been months of uncertainty leading to paralysis which I explore a little more in the video below..
We knew that we were juggling too many glass balls, yet we had no idea which ones we could safely put to one side. If you’re not familiar with the concept you can read about juggling the glass balls of overwhelm here.
Sometimes we feel trapped when we don’t think we have any way out. When we feel we don’t have any options. Yet the opposite is true too. Having too many options can cause as much overwhelm. We spin out of control as we search for the best “next step”. It becomes impossible to make a decision and stick with it. The grass always seems greener elsewhere.
Decision making stops because we become terrified of making the wrong decision. It happens even when we know that we won’t make the wrong decision. You see humans have a very strong inbuilt sense of self preservation. We don’t deliberately make bad decisions. We make the decision that is right based on the information that we have to hand. It is only with hindsight that we realise it was not the best course of action. Read more about the curse of hindsight here.
If you are feeling trapped, or going around and around in circles, it may not be because you don’t have enough options. The opposite may be true for you too. It could be that you have too many options available and you are struggling to work out your best “next step”.
The broader picture
Change, limited options, decision paralysis and/or “overchoice” isn’t limited to selling and moving to a new house. It can creep into any aspect of live as we strive to Create A New, Beautiful And Courageous Existence.
So, I’ve done a little digging and found these articles that might help you if you’re struggling too.
Firstly, here’s some more information about Overchoice
I also found an article about how to deal with Decision Paralysis. It is quite long. However, it is broken down into bite sized chunks and has easy to read sentences rather than long paragraphs.
The following articles also look at how to deal with Decision Paralysis. Some of them focus on too much choice when shopping: however, when you look at the suggestions on how to move forward, they can be applied to many situations.
5 Ways to beat decision paralysis
Why too much choice is stressful
Finding solid ground
The headlines are that we’re going to be taking another few months off major work on Canbace as we put our new strategy into practice. We’re still going to publish a blog once a week. However, there won’t be any progress made in launching the free or paid courses for another couple of months.
Until next time please remember:
You are strong. You are deserving. Be kind to yourself today, tomorrow and all the tomorrows to come.
In Canbace friendship
If anything I have written resonates I’d love to hear from you in the comments. I appreciate that this can be a difficult subject to speak openly about. If you don’t want me to publish your comment on the website, please let me know. Mention that your comment is NOT for publication and I will keep your words private.
Liz
Fantastic blog! In my line of work, having a clear understanding of all the options is important. But in my personal life, I’m finding myself often overwhelmed of where to start, let alone making a decision that I will feel confident about. Wishing you and Andrew loads of positive energy in the coming months xxx