Happy Canbace Day that didn’t happen

Happy belated Canbace Day!

WOW ….. you must be thinking why on earth didn’t the founder of Canbace celebrate Canbace Day in a much more visible way.

Why didn’t I blog. Tweet, insta and basically make a huge fuss about Canbace Day?

To be honest I’m asking myself the very same questions and I am reeling slightly for the reality of the reason.

Before sharing what DID happen, I want to take a step back and share with you what SHOULD have happened.

CANBACE DAY – Take One

When Brandi Lytle, of Not So Mommy … and I first set a date for Canbace Day my creative mind when into overdrive. So many ideas about events that could take place, both on-line and in the physical world.

You can ready Brandi’s blog about why she chose 1^st May here.

Ideas were written down and saved in the Niccisphere so they didn’t get lost over the intervening months.

During November and December, I started looking through those initial ideas. I ditched a few of them , put a few more into “mothballs” for future years and came up with some new ones. Research and brain-storming abounded. Andrew and I grew more excited about the very first Canbace Day and were desperate to share our ideas when the time was right.

Unfortunately, that time never arrived.

CANBACE DAY – Take Two

As 2018 morphed into 2019 Andrew and I focused on rebranding “The Childless Not By Choice Magazine” into “The Canbace Life Magazine.” A new domain was purchased, and new website built. I was also blogging everyday because I wanted to record my full year of Canbacing. Whilst I have come to realise that I have been Canbacing for a while now, it hadn’t been conscious.

Unfortunately, the blogging every day didn’t quite work out as planned. To take the pressure off I had planned well ahead aiming to have two months’ worth of blogs written and scheduled before the start date. Well that DIDN’T happen. Illness, me, Andrew, and pups, resulted in only three, that’s THREE, blogs being ready before 1^st Jan.

Results?

Continual catch up. More stress writing blogs in the shortest time possible. Not the idea at all.

After one month we made changes. Andrew was going to blog too! This would take a little pressure off me. Well that was the theory. Unfortunately, Andrew would be the first to admit that he doesn’t find this type of writing as easy as I do. I supported him as much as I could, which took time. Which rather defeated the object slightly.

Other decisions were also taken to free up more of my time.

We changed the publishing schedule for the magazine to four times a year, rather than six a year. Surely that would be enough. More on that theory later.

The blogging schedule was also changed, and then changed again. I can’t remember the exact order of things, so there may even have bee a third, if not fourth change in there somewhere.

All these changes meant that I would have more time to finish writing Unbreak My Heart AND start planning Canbace Day.

CANBACE DAY – Take Three

I can’t remember exactly when we decided to make further changes to the magazine schedule. It’s all a bit of a blur! The fact is that we changed from four issues per year to two issues per year. You can read the current issue by clicking on the image.

We also decided that there was no way I was going to be able to finish Unbreak My Heart and get it published in time for 1^st May.

Instead we were going to move forward with the launch of The Flamingo Club. This is the new on-line coaching programme designed to help other people who are Canbacing. Finishing The Flamingo Club had become a major priority for me as it gets me back to my coaching roots. You can find out more here.

Canbace Day was going to be a quieter affair this year. A blog, the next issues of the magazine AND the launch of The Flamingo Club would have to be enough.

After all, if the founder of Canbace isn’t able to put her efforts to Create A New, Beautiful And Courageous Existence first who can she expect other people to make their Canbacing a priority!

So that was the plan. Which DIDN’T happen.

Why?

The curveball

Although we’d been behind schedule for SOOOOOO many reasons, last week we were starting to make progress.

So much so we decided to celebrate our wedding anniversary with a meal out and some “us” time.

To double check this was still possible we spent a bit of time on Sunday morning checking our progress. We went to our local bakery and bought a “lovely”. A hot chocolate, and later a beer/wine, at the bar across the square accompanied our breakfast. During which we made a list of what needed to be done, and when, so that everything could go according to plan on 1^st May.

We left the bar incredibly happy. It had been hard work: however, our low-key plans for Canbace Day were achievable. We might even be able to take time out to mow the grass if the weather remained good.

On our way home we stopped in to see “G”. We do this most Sundays. “G” is the 97-year-old father of a girlfriend. She moved to Australia last autumn and we’re part of the “check on G” strategy that she put into place.

When we arrived, the place was in darkness. We opened the kitchen door and poked our head in.

Silence.

This happens sometimes when “G” has had a bad night. He sleeps in, understandably. We didn’t call out because, if he was asleep, we didn’t want to wake him.

Thankfully something stopped us from turning around and leaving. I think we heard a noise although I am not 100% sure of that. Anyway, SOMETHING made us tiptoe over to the sitting room door and quietly open it.

Then we DID hear something.

A moan.

Door open. Rush to the bed.

“G” was on the floor, trapped between the bed and his “walker”.

Improvise, adapt and overcome

He’d slipped, rather than fell, out of bed. We waited until it was confirmed that nothing was broken. Other than feeling a bit groggy he wasn’t any worse for his adventure.

We checked on him three more times on Sunday. First thing on Monday we phoned his daughter to update her. We saw him three times that day. Each time he was feeling a little brighter. On Tuesday he phoned us at 7:30am to say he was OK. We called in on our way home from our anniversary meal. This time he was sitting in his favourite armchair watching the snooker. He looked better than he had in a couple of weeks.

All was good.

Andrew and I explained that we would drop by on Wednesday afternoon because we were going to be very busy in the morning. Remember that little thing called a magazine to publish!

We worked late into the night on Tuesday, playing catch up for the work that we didn’t get done on Sunday and Monday. I suppose we could have cancelled our anniversary meal: however, celebrating our marriage should be a major part of Canbacing so we didn’t.

Come Wednesday morning we still had a few hours work which I finished at noon. A quick bit of lunch and then Andrew could create the flipbook file and upload the magazine onto the website.

Sorted.

As we raised our forks to our mouth to the first time the phone rang.

We suspected “G” phoning to say he was OK and don’t visit unless we were passing. It was a bank holiday after all.

Flying without plans

It wasn’t “G”, it was his cleaner. “Do you know where he is because I’ve searched the house and can’t find him.”

“Oh C**P”

After quickly gulping down our lunch we were in the car. Ten minutes after the call and we were searching the house, the barns and the garden. No sign of “G”.

No note. Nothing.

We were at the house for nearly three hours because we had to wait from the Gendarme to arrive. After all a 97-year-old man doesn’t suddenly disappear.

He was eventually traced to a local hospital. He’d not been feeling good during the night so phoned the fire brigade. That’s who you call in France. When he was admitted at 01:05 on Wednesday morning they asked who they should call. “No one. My daughter is in Australia and my son is recovering from surgery.” He didn’t ask them to call us because he’d already been such a bother and didn’t want to cause us more of an inconvenience.

The magazine was eventually published. However, there was no blog and no Flamingo Club either.

Instead our wonderful, relaxed and positive Canbace Day was one of the most stressful days we’ve had in a long time. Which takes some doing. We thought we were going to be involved in a search as it was feared that “G” might have stumbled out into the road and then fallen into a ditch. Thankfully that didn’t happen.

Moving forward

A Canbace blog has now been published for Canbace Day. However, it wasn’t the one I had planned.

Sound familiar?

The Flamingo Club WILL be launched. However, it’s been delayed. Hopefully the FREE introductory access available some time tomorrow. If it’s not ready then, then it’s not ready. The last few days have taken their toll on me and I have to priorities my health. Even if that means letting other people down.

Sound familiar?

Finally, I’ve made the executive decision that due to circumstances beyond my control the 1^st May 2019 DIDN’T HAPPEN. I’m re-writing the history books.

There can never be another FIRST Canbace Day and I don’t want it to be this one.

So, it’s official, the inaugural Canbace Day will be 1^st May 2020.

Which gives me 364 days to plan!

Surely that will give me enough time to ensure that it is a success.

Talking of time, there’s one more change to our blogging schedule ….

On Monday’s we’re going to publish the #WhatNotToSay series. We will alternate this with another series we’ve got in the pipeline. Although the first of that series may not happen until after we get back from our desperately needed holiday.

Then on Thursday’s Andrew and I are going to take turns on who publishes something. Which means that Andrew is writing his blog for next week.

What has all of this taught us?

You need to be adaptable and go with the flow. No matter how much you plan unexpected things can go wrong. Finally, we are stronger than we think!

I hope your 1^st May 2019 (that DIDN’T happen) was better than ours.

I must finish now because it’s time to visit “G” in hospital so we can give his daughter a proper update later.

Be kind to yourself …

In CANBACE friendship!

 

If anything I have written resonates I’d love to hear from you in the comments. I appreciate that this can be a difficult subject to speak openly about. If you don’t want me to publish your comment on the website, please let me know. I will keep your words private.